“You cannot thrive without values. In time, your values will always reveal your value.” Dr Joshua Awesome
I was seated at an intimate leadership breakfast with a man whose very presence embodied what I’ve come to call quiet authority — Mr. Fani Titi, CEO of Investec.
This was not just another executive networking opportunity. It was a divine moment of clarity — a space where the air felt heavier, not with ego, but with depth. In the rush of a world obsessed with personal branding and social metrics, here sat a man unmoved by applause and anchored instead in something far sturdier: values-based leadership.
Leadership as rootedness, not height
The conversation reminded me that true leadership is not measured by how high you climb, but by how deeply you are rooted. Like trees, leaders may appear impressive by their reach into the sky, but it is the unseen root system — their values — that determines whether they can survive storms.
Values-based leadership, as I have come to practice and teach it, rests on five timeless pillars:
- Purpose – A clear “why” that outlives your personal ambition.
- Perspective – The ability to see the bigger picture beyond your own vantage point.
- Clarity – Knowing not just what you stand for, but what you will not stand for.
- Competence – The skill to deliver on your commitments without hiding behind intent.
- Humility – Recognising that leadership is stewardship, not ownership.
These are not merely “traits” for an aspiring leader to tick off a checklist. They are spiritual disciplines — daily practices that shape how we show up in the world.
When the conversation turned personal
Somewhere between a discussion on ethical finance and global economic uncertainty, I asked Mr. Titi a deeply personal question: “How do you lead with strength when carrying an ‘invincible disability’?”
The term “invincible disability” is one I explore in my upcoming book Accidentally Disabled – The Journey to Thriving Against All Odds. It speaks to those living with chronic illnesses, invisible disabilities, or ongoing emotional pain — people who metaphorically crawl every day, striving to be recognised, not pitied.
Being visible, I’ve learned, is not about being dramatic. It’s about being dignified in our needs — especially when asking for help feels like its own kind of suffering.
Mr. Titi’s response, part of his personal Wealth of Wisdom (WOW), struck a chord in my soul. Without breaking confidences, I can say his answer was a masterclass in leading without self-pity and finding strength in vulnerability.
The science behind the struggle
Behavioural science offers a lens into why this conversation resonated so deeply. In moments of crisis — whether that crisis is public like a pandemic, or private like living with an unspoken illness — our brains tend to default to survival mode. The frontal cortex, which governs rational decision-making, yields control to the limbic system, home of our fight-or-flight response.
This shift is adaptive when danger is imminent. But when the “danger” is an ongoing life condition — physical pain, depression, or systemic exclusion — the constant activation of the limbic system can leave a person perpetually exhausted. It becomes a different kind of leadership challenge: not simply inspiring others, but managing one’s own internal energy in a world that may never fully understand the load you carry.
Invisible battles in visible positions
Leaders with invisible disabilities often live in the tension between perception and reality. They may project calm while battling chronic fatigue. They may deliver powerful speeches while silently managing pain.
The workplace — and by extension, society — often rewards visible productivity while ignoring the resilience required to keep showing up when your body or mind is not in perfect sync with the day’s demands.
Here’s where values make the difference. A leader without deep internal anchors can quickly burn out or retreat into cynicism. But a leader grounded in purpose, perspective, clarity, competence, and humility can convert personal trials into sources of collective strength.
From surviving to thriving
In Accidentally Disabled, I write about the journey from merely surviving a life-altering spinal injury to finding ways to thrive in spite of it. That journey was not linear. It involved wrestling between grief and gratitude, between the limitations of my body and the liberation of my mind.
Through that struggle, I discovered something paradoxical: the more my body slowed down, the more my vision expanded. The less I could physically “do,” the more intentional I became about what I chose to do. And in that intentionality lay power — not the power of force, but the power of focus.
This is the kind of power that values-based leadership cultivates. It is not about pretending challenges don’t exist. It is about deciding what those challenges will and will not take from you.
A question worth asking
The leadership breakfast ended as quietly as it began. There were no viral selfie moments, no grand declarations. Just the lingering sense that I had been in the presence of someone who lived their leadership as a calling, not a career strategy.
As I walked away, I found myself returning to the same question I now pose to you:
What values are guiding your journey right now?
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Dr. Joshua Awesome is a Coaching Psychologist/Executive and Business Performance Coach who has supported over 100,000 professionals across Africa and the globe. He can be reached via: joshua@africainmind.org
