Onome Amuge

Cynda Oloruntogbe-Ayoola’s Mingling, Marriage, Motherhood offers a timely and insightful examination of the contemporary female experience, richly focused on narratives of personal and professional resilience in contemporary Nigerian society. 

The debut work, structured around the lives of three Nigerian women (Fiyin-Ada, Mony, and Amira) is centred around identity, relationships, and the often-unseen struggles that define womanhood in the modern era.

Oloruntogbe-Ayoola, a Nigerian writer with a background in Mass Communication and nearly a decade of experience in the development sector, brings a grounded and empathetic voice to her storytelling. 

Her professional engagement with societal dynamics undoubtedly informs the book’s portrayal of the beautiful, messy, and layered experience of being a woman. This background lends a particular credibility to her exploration of the realities of womanhood, a perspective she passionately believes has only just begun to be adequately explored from within.

The author is explicit about her intent, stating: “This is not a ‘how-to’ book. You will not learn how to mingle, be married or navigate motherhood in this book. It is rather a deep dive into the stories we aren’t often so loud about. These characters: Fiyin-Ada, Mony, and Amira may be fictional, but their struggles, doubts, joys, and triumphs are very real.” This direct approach positions the book not as a prescriptive manual for life stages, but as a narrative mirror, inviting readers to find resonance within its pages.

At its heart, Mingling, Marriage, Motherhood champions the enduring power of sisterhood and the transformative strength derived from supportive relationships. The book  reflects the transformative strength of having the right people beside you ‘when life gets loud’, a message that resonates in an age where individual pressures on women, from demanding careers to complex family responsibilities, are increasingly intense. The narrative aims to be a source of validation and hope, crafted for every woman who has ever felt overwhelmed, unseen, or uncertain, but still chose to rise.

By focusing on the quiet battles often fought behind closed doors, Oloruntogbe-Ayoola contributes to a vital conversation about the unacknowledged aspects of female existence. Her work offers a candid, non-judgmental space for reflection on personal choices and the subtle negotiations of identity within relationships. 

For readers seeking narratives that affirm and explore the depth of the female journey, Mingling, Marriage, Motherhood presents a timely and compassionate perspective, rooted in a belief that understanding these experiences is crucial for broader societal empathy and progress. The author’s personal journey, from a sudden spark to penning this book, further highlights the often-unforeseen paths to impactful contributions, mirroring the themes of resilience found within her work.